- this is so depressing
- August 3rd, 2012
this is so depressing, this hurts so much. I feel he picked her over me. It has been what over 4 years and he picks this boring ass pretty bitch. I feel I hate her for this. I should really hate him. He has hurt me over and over...why do I still care? what is it about him that keeps me going back. what should I do? Will anything I do make anything different. I feel the answer is no, I can't fix this problem I can't change this situation. I can't change how I feel. & I can't change the damn truth, because the truth is he is with her. He is with her for a reason....he wants to be with her....I feel I am not good enough some how. Why am I not good enough I wonder? Why have I never been good enough. I was only good enough to talk to, to lie to, for him to pretend he loves and cares about me..is this how someone treats you that loves and cares for you they run off with some other bitch and date her? I've got to give up, it's been 4 years of never me only me for a few months while he is lonely. I want to change, but in the same sense I dont want to change. I want him to come for me. Is this a fantasy of mine. The facts are he will never be mine. We will never be together. Why can't I walk away? Why won't I walk away. I've got to give up on him & me forever nonsense...any normal person would realize give it up.